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The son of an ass brays twice a day.-Span.

There appears in this last to be a reference to the ass who was so very like a lion, until he tried to roar; but after that the lion skin was useless. In the same way we seem to learn that, unless there is genuine kindly feeling, the mere affectation of interest, and the payment of attentions for ulterior objects, are more likely to attract dislike than good will. The self seeking speedily becomes apparent, as in the case of the foiled canvassers whom Macauley has commemorated.

They were gentlemen kind and well-bred,
No flouting, no sneering, no scorn;
They asked after my wife-who was dead
And my children-who never were born!

Dogs bark as they are bred,
And fawn as they are fed.

Some men pray cream, and live skim milk.-Dr. Beecher.

AMBIGUOUS.

It has been suggested that this series will hardly be complete, unless some reference be made to Ambiguous Sayings; such for instance as that famous medical maxim.

Stuff a cold and starve a fever;

the only approach, I ever heard, to a rational interpretation of this, was that a person who could be guilty of the former, might possibly also be capable of committing the latter!

Other sayings of this kind may be remembered, which once vexed our childhood; and, it is to be presumed, will afflict the rising generation to the end of time.

Those that ask must not have, and those that don't ask don't want.

How many blue beans make five?

Why do Cheshire cats always grin ?

Put a pinch of salt on a bird's tail if you want to catch it! I have since learned that there are other things beside birds which are best taken

Cum grano salis.

with a little allowance.

Frightening a bird is not the way to catch it.

You cant catch birds by throwing stones at them.-Whately. Again there are opposing sayings which thus seem ambiguous.

Common Fame's

Seldom to blame.

Common report's a common liar.

and then again

'Murder will out,'

Mortui non mordent,

'Dead men tell no tales.'

It is not difficult to see that both sayings are true under different circumstances.

A higher flight is taken when we come to the Ambiguous Oracles of antiquity. Here we have dubious sayings indeed; and, as some have thought, of a very dubious origin.

On

Among very prudent people, in Roman Catholic countries, it has sometimes been the custom, in churches dedicated to St. Michael, to present one candle to the Saint himself, and another to the figure lying under his feet; so as to stand well with both parties. the same principle the old Scotch laird, before he went out with the Pretender, had put his son into the English army, that the property might remain in the family under all eventualities. Some of the recounters of the classic oracles have been no less sorely puzzled as to what source to attribute them. And, it must be admitted, there is something in them, occasionally, that is rather uncanny. They are so cunningly worded; answering to the consulter's wish, and yet equally true if the counselled undertaking prove an utter failure, that we are reminded of

The juggling fiend-who never spake before,

Yet cries, I warned thee! when the deed is o'er.-Byron. A remarkable instance is supplied by that King's fate, who was assured by the Oracle that if he crossed a certain river he would destroy a great Empire.' And so he did, but then it happened to be his own! Thou shalt go thou shalt return never by war shalt thou perish,

is another such utterance, which lured on to destruction. And then, there is another which can only be given in the Latin tongue the conciseness of which is specially suited to these sayings.

Aio te acide Romanos vincere posse!

which, as Pyrrhus found to his cost, really meant that the Romans would conquer him.

In another sense that Irish barrister's statement cannot be altogether acquitted of ambiguity:

And so my clients resolved on a bold course, they took the bull by the horns, and indicted him for perjury.'

Mr. Pitt upon carpets may be quoted for a witty use of one such dubious declaration. This was his toast at a great public dinner in that locality.

May the staple trade of Kidderminster be trampled under foot by all the world!

But ambiguity is sometimes produced unintentionally, by that noble contempt of punctuation still occasionally to be met with. Take the following.

Erected
To the memory of

John Phillipps

who was accidently shot by his brother as a mark of affection.

And again, culled from the correspondence column of an American paper

'The following lines were written by one who has for many years slept in his grave for his own amusement.'

Nor can those two Jury verdicts be considered quite out of this category.

Guilty-but served her right!

Not guilty-but not to do it again!

The figure Anacoleuthon affords other examples where, as in many epigrams, the apparent meaning

suddenly changes to the opposite. As for example in that dialogue between an old Incumbent and the Next Presentation.

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'I'm glad to see you well,' Oh! faithless breath!
What!' glad to see me well, and wish my death?
'No more,
pray, my good sir, this misgiving,

I wish not for your death, but for your living!'"
So again in that similar epigram entitled
The younger Brother.

Ah! cruel wretch! indignant Crito said

"Tis plain you wish your elder brother dead!'
'Nay, heaven forbid,' quoth Tom, not I, Sir, never ;'
'Those we wish dead, they say, live on for ever!'

That rejoinder of a well known opponent of one of the Burial Bills partook also somewhat of this character. The Nonconformists charged him with objecting to their being buried in his churchyard. On the contrary,' he promptly answered, 'I'm perfectly ready to bury you all!'

One or two more of this kind may be added.

It is a maxim in the schools

That women always doat on fools,
If so, dear Sir, I'm sure your wife
Must love you as she loves her life!

The rule of the Road is a paradox quite,
Both in riding and driving along;

If you go to the Left you are sure to go right,
If you go to the Right you go wrong!

Still more remarkable is the conclusion to which some one seems to have been led by this peculiarity. If you go to the Left you go to the right;

If you go to the Right you go to the wrong;
And so its' the best to keep straight along!

Punch will I hope excuse my quoting his useful addition.

But in walking the streets 'tis a different case,

To the right it is right you should bear;

To the left should be left quite enough of free space
For the persons you chance to meet there.

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